What Communication Challenges?

misunderstandings

Have you ever tried to explain or present your point of view and end up with confusion and or frustration? This may have something to do with the communication comfort zone you are in. You may be communicating how you would like to be spoken too. Not the words, per-say but the approach that you are using.  Most everyone has had heard the term know your audience, well I want to share how I have learned to take this concept to a whole new level. Last month, I just finished up a course to become a DISC certified trainer. DISC is a behavior assessment tool based on the DISC theory of psychologist William Marston. It centers on four different behavioral traits, which today are called: dominance, influence, steadiness, and compliance. His method has been applied in business for many years and is used as a way of identifying predictable actions and personality traits within human behavior.

I learned about DISC as I was taking my coaching training and fell in love with it. This has led me to want to increase my knowledge and experience with it so I can share with my coaching clients. What I have found, is it has helped me to identify the “communication comfort zone” of others I work with and increase my overall effectiveness with connecting with them.

Let me share an example of how this became an ah-ha for me. A colleague and I were putting together a training agenda for an upcoming meeting. She had also been through the DISC training and was familiar with how to stretch and become aware of others and their comfort style when working. I am notoriously a careful planner and like to address things on a linear level. First we figure out step 1, then step 2, then step 3 and so on. She on the other hand was more of a creative thinker and loved to jump around from step to step with complete disregard to how I wanted to do it. Honestly, we were spinning through our planning with no progress at all and both become very frustrated. As I was killing her creativity, she was making me a nervous wreck being so frivolous with our precious time. (Have you ever experienced a meeting like this?) I bet you have!

I am not sure exactly what triggered it, but we both stopped at the height of our frustration and took a deep breath and laughed out loud. She exclaimed “Oh this is your C personality coming out” and I said, “Yep, and this is your I”. After the sweeping wave of relief, we were able to adjust our comfort zones to be more accommodating with each other knowing that if we can both be on purpose with our communication with each other, we can maximize our time together and dare I say even enjoy and appreciate what the other brought to the table.

This is just one example of many benefits that understanding DISC has helped me to connect with another. If you are interested in taking your own DISC assessment and learning more about your communication comfort zone and how to identify others, contact me today.

 

 

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How are you setting goals?

goal-setting-exercise

Top sales expert and trainer Brian Tracy’s success philosophy best represents goal setting and how the process can catapult you in the direction you desire.  “Brian Tracy has studied, researched, written and spoken for 30 years in the fields of economics, history, business, philosophy and psychology. He is the top selling author of over 45 books that have been translated into dozens of languages” (Brian Tracy International, 2013). I consider some of his popular myth’s regarding goal setting especially valuable.
Myth 1 – I already have goals… i.e. I want to be rich; I want to be thin, happy, successful… These are wishes, not goals!  A goal is carefully designed, written and rewritten. Myth 2- I do not need goals… Not having goals is like taking a trip without a map. You end up being reactionary and responsive to the things that happen on the way. Myth 3 – My goals are all stored in my mind and do not need written goals…The average stream of consciousness has over 1,500 thoughts or words per minute. They become jumbled, vague, and contradictory.  If goals are not written down they will be floating among other thoughts and offer no clarity or direction.  Myth 4 – I don’t know how to set goals… Setting a goal is a skill like time management and can be learned. Myth 5 – Goals don’t work, life is too unpredictable…Consider this analogy – When a plane takes off for a distant city it will be off course 99 percent of the time. The complexity of aviation requires the pilot to focus on continual redirection and changing course towards the desired destination.  This is similar to goal setting as re-evaluation is necessary to keep up with life’s unpredictability.

Have you ever felt as though you have your goals set but something is always getting in the way of achieving them? This is one of the top reasons why using a coach is helpful. A coach can help you set the right goals, and hold you accountable so you can attain them faster.

What are you waiting for? Contact me today for your free session and start building the future you deserve!

*Brian Tracy International. (2013).  About Brian and Brian Tracy International. Retrieved from http://www.briantracy.com/about/default.aspx

WHAT IS YOUR PHILOSOPHY?

Basketball season is coming to an end and with that it reminds me of one of my greatest teachers. He is considered one of the greatest coaches in history, and his philosophy inspires me to up my game in my life, John Wooden. Wooden is a man who many accredited not only the positive changes for the game of basketball, but of life as well. Just a small taste of his accomplishments was that he coached his team to ten NCAA Men’s Basketball Championships, seven of which were consecutive! Additionally, his team holds the record for the most appearances, consecutive appearances, and victories in the Final Four*. And there are other achievements that many coaches dream for. The best part of what Wooden taught about the game of basketball is also applicable  to how we show up in our lives.  Below is Wooden’s, Pyramid of Success and I am curious, do any of these resonate with you?

wooden

If you do not already have a philosophy in your life that you stand for, what are you standing for? The results in your life are strongly related to what you stand for and what you focus on. My intention is strong when going for my goals!

My wish for you is that you have the same!

*You can learn more about John Wooden and his work at http://www.coachwooden.com

Happy New Year!

st kitts

Do you feel the connection that we share with everyone around us? In the past, the New Year was one of my most favorite times of the year. It represented a chance to start over, a renewal of sorts. This renewal represented hopefulness, excitement, and possibilities waiting in the upcoming calendar year. Most recently, I had the realization that this energy of renewal is available to us not only in the New Year, but also every morning that we wake to a fresh new day. It is as endless as we choose it to be. Just as the ocean waves never stop washing the shore, we have the opportunity to seize every day as a new day filled with new possibilities of creating and living the life of our own unique dreams and intentions.

We are all connected and what we give out, we also receive. To help you unleash the energy of renewal become aware of what you are giving to others and the world. Ask yourself, what are you giving to others? Here are some suggestions to activate the energy of renewal in your life.

  • Notice when someone does something good and give them a compliment.
  • Tell someone in your life that you love, appreciate, and value them.
  • Forgive someone and let go of the negative things that you have been holding on to in your past.

 I make it a habit to actively give out positive energy and am able to experience the power and vitality of renewal often. This practice pays off in more ways you can even imagine!

Wishing you the happiest New Year in 2015!

Our Connection

Mother holds the hand of her child

I was talking to my twelve year old daughter the other day after we went to see the movie, The Hunger Games: The MockingJay –  Part 1. She was telling me how she really loved the movie and the way it was portrayed. She said that some of the scenes were not how she imagined when she was reading the book. The conversation reminded me of the things that I learned in my psychology classes which I was really excited to share with her.

“I pictured the dining areas that they were eating in as my cafeteria at school” – my daughter.

“That is because everything we read, hear, or observe is filtered by our own personal experiences. This gives you a great understanding of people when they tell you stories. They are telling you based on what they know and what they have experienced. Remember that, as it will help you understand where people are coming from” –  me.

I am grateful that I have the opportunity to give my daughter the insight of how to understand people and the way that they understand the life around them as early as age twelve. I think it will give her a huge advantage growing up. She will be able to connect with others authentically and really see them for who they are. I can think of no greater gift.

Have you ever considered that the way you feel about something is because it is rooted in a past experience? Just because it feels that way, does not mean it is the only way.

What are the possibilities?

Living YOUR Why

Have you considered the idea that everyday you have the opportunity to live the way you want to live? The choice  to do the work that you long for, make the money you want to make, create the relationships that you love?

What are you choosing? Today, what  did you choose? How about yesterday or last month?

Among all the “distractions” that you may be experiencing, (emails, gossip, internal dialogue to name just a few) what tools are in your tool chest that help you to ensure that your focus on attaining all that you desire and more?  Your focus creates your intention, your intention creates your reality. Coaching helps you to align your focus, thereby your intention, and your reality.

What will you do with this information?

 

decisionsCompetency in emotional intelligence or (EQ) affects decision making and influences the level of success in an individuals life. Situations in life evoke emotion because that is how people relate to the world. Whether we are aware of it or not we make countless emotional assessments everyday and it either positively or negatively affects our decision making. When we become more effective with our emotions we are able to make proactive decisions that lead us to our own unique desired outcomes. We accomplish this by becoming adept in 4 key areas.

1. Become aware of your emotions
2. Learn how to express emotions purposefully
3. Apply factual conscious reasoning of your emotions
4. Help others to manage their emotions

Coaching helps bring forth awareness and assists you in the process of discovering what your emotions mean specifically to you. This information will help you to make quicker decisions that are aligned with what you desire and get the results you want.

What will you do with this information?